This won’t be a long blog today. It won’t be advising what to do or what not to do. Just some personal comments on life and on relationships. To the younger generation I’m an old man but, on the other hand, I feel young when I hang out with 90-year-olds. And I feel young when my marathon times are faster than those in the field, most of whom are much younger than I am. Age is so
relative.
At 66, I’ve been around the block a few times; made my share of mistakes; done some things right and some things wrong. I’m closer to the finish than the starting line, if you catch my drift.
But, of all my successes and failures in life, I am most proud of my five children. I’d like to say that I’m close to each one, but that might make my nose grow. Still, when I get the chance, I savor time spent with them. Harry Chapin documented this in his song Cat's in the Cradle, a ballad about how a father is too busy to spend time with his young son. Yet he soon finds that, when his son has grown up, he is too busy to spend time with his father. What goes around … Time passes quickly. Trust me - it does.
So this past weekend was a treasure for me – to spend three days with my 30-something son in a trip to Birmingham, Alabama, to run the Mercedes marathon together. Married less than a year, he can still be considered a newlywed. So I was surprised that he wanted to spend this weekend with his dad. His understanding wife is a welcome addition to our family.
He wanted to stop at the Abbey of Gethsemani in rural Kentucky on the way, which we did, unfortunately missing the monks who were at lunch. I’ve visited many times but it was my son’s first stop here. Inspiring.
Since he was under the gun at work, he was rightfully concerned with stress, which we discussed at length on the long drive to Birmingham from Cincinnati. Looking back on all the studying I did and all the seminar presentations I made during the 80s and 90s, I realized how much stress management helped me in my own life. In those days I never guessed that someday this knowledge would allow me to help my adult son.
We discussed several aspects of stress management and methods to deal with it, which are presented elsewhere on this website and in the LifeNuts book as well. One technique I explained was to write down the three most stressful episodes at the end of the day. Then write down how each could have been worse and three ways each could have been better. Also discussed deep
relaxation methods and hypnosis, which are skills that can be valuable in stressful situations.
I’ve found that many young people disregard the advice of older adults, from whom they could learn significantly. But, luckily for him, my son listens. And if he applies this knowledge and becomes skilled in stress management, he will lead a much happier life than if he doesn’t.
Running the marathon was also memorable. Despite chilly starting temperatures, we had fun and finished the 26-mile race, still alive and well enough to make the seven-plus hour drive back home. Whether it’s running a marathon, playing a weekend of golf, or hiking in the mountains, spending time with one’s adult children is time well spent. Remember: time passes quickly and wait
relative.
At 66, I’ve been around the block a few times; made my share of mistakes; done some things right and some things wrong. I’m closer to the finish than the starting line, if you catch my drift.
But, of all my successes and failures in life, I am most proud of my five children. I’d like to say that I’m close to each one, but that might make my nose grow. Still, when I get the chance, I savor time spent with them. Harry Chapin documented this in his song Cat's in the Cradle, a ballad about how a father is too busy to spend time with his young son. Yet he soon finds that, when his son has grown up, he is too busy to spend time with his father. What goes around … Time passes quickly. Trust me - it does.
So this past weekend was a treasure for me – to spend three days with my 30-something son in a trip to Birmingham, Alabama, to run the Mercedes marathon together. Married less than a year, he can still be considered a newlywed. So I was surprised that he wanted to spend this weekend with his dad. His understanding wife is a welcome addition to our family.
He wanted to stop at the Abbey of Gethsemani in rural Kentucky on the way, which we did, unfortunately missing the monks who were at lunch. I’ve visited many times but it was my son’s first stop here. Inspiring.
Since he was under the gun at work, he was rightfully concerned with stress, which we discussed at length on the long drive to Birmingham from Cincinnati. Looking back on all the studying I did and all the seminar presentations I made during the 80s and 90s, I realized how much stress management helped me in my own life. In those days I never guessed that someday this knowledge would allow me to help my adult son.
We discussed several aspects of stress management and methods to deal with it, which are presented elsewhere on this website and in the LifeNuts book as well. One technique I explained was to write down the three most stressful episodes at the end of the day. Then write down how each could have been worse and three ways each could have been better. Also discussed deep
relaxation methods and hypnosis, which are skills that can be valuable in stressful situations.
I’ve found that many young people disregard the advice of older adults, from whom they could learn significantly. But, luckily for him, my son listens. And if he applies this knowledge and becomes skilled in stress management, he will lead a much happier life than if he doesn’t.
Running the marathon was also memorable. Despite chilly starting temperatures, we had fun and finished the 26-mile race, still alive and well enough to make the seven-plus hour drive back home. Whether it’s running a marathon, playing a weekend of golf, or hiking in the mountains, spending time with one’s adult children is time well spent. Remember: time passes quickly and wait
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